Race for the Cure Miami 2007

I participated again this year in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in downtown Miami which was held this past Saturday, October 20th. Last year was the first time I had attended the annual event -- four weeks after learning of my own breast cancer diagnosis. My father did the entire 5k walk with me last year without complaining at all. He didn't even complain that he got no breakfast before we left the house at 6:30 in the morning. (That's how I KNEW this man loved me! Ha, ha.)

Each year, it is such a powerful experience to be among so many thousands of people who come out for the event! The Survivor Ceremony above all is the most emotional part of the day. It is bittersweet to see and stand among so many survivors ... but then it reduces you to such tears to know that so many women have been afflicted with this disease at all, and how unspeakable it is that so many have also lost their brave fight to this beast.

I am almost ashamed to say that last October was the first time I had truly ever noticed all the pink ribbons and advertisements about breast cancer awareness. I thought to myself that maybe it had suddenly become so much more commercialized in 2006. (Now I conclude it's sort of like until you purchase that bright yellow VW bug for your own driving pleasure, you never notice any other bright yellow VW bugs on the road. Unless, of course, it's a Truly Nolen vehicle, but then how could you miss the mouse ears and tail that go along with it?) It should come as no surprise that breast cancer awareness is a cause that will forever be a meaningful part of my life now. Accordingly, I was determined this year to help raise money for the Susan G. Komen Foundation which is the world's largest grassroots network of breast cancer survivors and activists fighting to save lives, empower people, ensure quality care for all and energize science to find the cures. Thanks to events like the Komen Race for the Cure, nearly $1 billion has been invested to fulfill its promise, becoming the largest source of nonprofit funds dedicated to the fight against breast cancer in the world.

I was so genuinely touched and overwhelmed by the kind, generous donations so many of my family and friends made to my personal fundraising goal of $1,500.00 this year. In fact, I well exceeded the goal and raised close to $2,500.00. Thank you again to all of you wonderful earth angels who joined me in the effort to move towards eradicating this dreadful disease!

It was also a source of great personal pride that I was able to actually RUN the entire 5k (or 3.1 mile) race this year! Yes, ME! The one who always says, "There's only ONE thing I think about the entire time I run. That is 'When can I stop????'" But I did it, after training on outdoor runs with my cousin, Tanya, for approximately 4 weeks. I finally figured out how to run without being totally exhausted. I just had to slooooooowwwwww down my pace to damn near a shuffling of my feet. I started out training at a 17-minute mile pace, and now I can run at something closer to 13 minutes per mile. Ultimately, I completed the race in 48 minutes, but at least 3-5 minutes of that time could be shaved off because of how difficult it was to get around the crowd of people at the start line who were walking. My friends, Andrea, Allison, and Nell, as well as my cousin, Tanya, kept me motivated during the run. I literally almost quit coming back over the uphill drawbridge near the end of the race, but then I thought of all the names I was wearing on my back and stayed motivated to run until the end.

It was with tremendous sadness that just days before this year's race, I learned I would have another name to honor and add to my memoriam list of women who have lost their courageous battle with breast cancer. My dear friend/former boyfriend, Glenn ("Gumby") Harris, sadly lost his mother, Gloria Harris, on October 3, 2007. I have known Gumby for close to 20 years and have always had great affection for his family, particularly his mother. She was such a kind, gentle, beautiful soul ... not to mention how incredibly pretty she was. It brought me to such tears when I first learned the news and I even type through tears now. She is a new angel to watch over us all now. My love to her and my wish for peace to her entire family.

My thought, as I ran this year with all those names on my back, was that it is best to honor the memory and legacy of all those who have lost their lives by living well. But as my friend and YSC sister, Julie, pointed out, "It is still just too many names."

Janice, Nell, and me before the race.

My girlfriend, Renee, who organized our team this year.

We raised $5,937.00 as a team!

Renee is a franchise owner of "The Art of Exotic Dancing for Women -- A New You" and was a proud sponsor of this Komen event.

My cousin and running buddy, Tanya.

Allison, Andrea, me, and Tanya.

(These sweet chicas stuck to running with me until the very end.)

My younger cousin, Alyssa, and her girlfriend, Tiffany.

HOT and WORN OUT after the race!

WE DID IT!!!!

(Andy from FSU law school hydrating behind us.)

My sorority sister and fellow BC survivor, Bery, with me.

Allison, Lilliana, Marlon (his wife, Carla, is another survivor), and me.

Me, Julie (from my YSC support group), her sister, Claire, and their two friends.

Julie has the BEST reconstruction I have ever seen!

(I will be thrilled if my hooters wind up looking that good. Damn!)

Julie organized her team after I had already committed to another,

but all the money goes to the same great cause in the end.

Sweat or no sweat, I couldn't believe Allison was having chills in 90 degree weather!

The highlight of my day (everyday) ... FOOD!!!!

Breakfast at News Cafe on South Beach after the race.

My Fifteen Minutes of Fame

Do you remember I said early on that I was going to be a star when I got finished with my chemo treatments? Well, it's official. I landed my television appearance today!

Here's the skinny. I was recently interviewed by a syndicated columnist and humorous relationship expert, Lisa Daily, for an article she was writing for LifetimeTV.com. Since the month of October is typically all about breast cancer awareness, the topic of the article was Dating with Breast Cancer. This all came about when my friend, Jackie, a publicist, forwarded me an e-mail query from Lisa Daily seeking interviews with women who dated during their breast cancer treatments. If there are two things I know a great deal about, it's breast cancer and DATING! I wound up speaking with Lisa over the phone for nearly half an hour, entertaining her with my "Carrie Bradshaw" (Sex in the City) dating experiences. Everyone who knows me knows I am a fairly open book, and I'm willing to share most things about my life -- good or bad -- if I feel it will have some relevance or positive significance for someone else. So I opened up to Lisa and at the end of the conversation, she thanked me for being so honest and assured me she would be "delicate" with me in the short article. This actually gave me a little pause because while our interview was very conversational, I wondered if perhaps I had revealed too much. I really don't mind putting myself out there when I talk of my experiences, but I would never want to cause anyone (particularly someone I may have dated and cared about meaningfully at one time) any embarrassment. I'll come back to this point.

In conjunction with the article, Lisa asked if I would be willing to come to Tampa to tape a television appearance for a morning talk show that she appears on each Friday. So that's what I did today! The show is called "Daytime" and it has two hosts, Dave and Cyndi ... very nice people who I met during the taping. The show also has an entertainment host who was bouncing around like a little firecracker! She was soooo full of energy and I kept staring at her because she looked sooooo familiar to me. Turns out, she was Lindsay MacDonald who used to be on my all-time favorite MTV show, "The Real World (Seattle)." (I think I finally came to terms with the idea that I was too old to keep watching "The Real World" and I stopped three years ago with the Philadelphia season.) Everyone was really great and made me feel right at home. In fact, the set literally had the feel of being in someone's home ... like sitting around the kitchen table.

The taping itself only lasted for perhaps a 5-6 minute segment. I was asked a few general questions by the hosts regarding my dating experiences, and then Lisa was also there to lend her comments and advice. I think it went very well from the bits and pieces that I can clearly remember. At least, that's what I was told. I was very nervous throughout, so much of the interview seemed like an out of body experience. I probably would not have been as anxious if I had not been told just moments before the taping that it was going to air in 10 small markets (e.g., Jacksonville, FL; Raleigh, NC; Macon, GA; etc.). I had initially thought it would only air locally in Tampa, which was plenty big to me!

When I got back home, I found the article Lisa wrote online. She had mentioned to me that she was limited to 500 words, so much of what I said had to be condensed and I wasn't the only individual she interviewed. While the quotes in the article do accurately reflect things I said, I was admittedly a little surprised by the context. I think the way my dating interactions were characterized in the article sound much worse in print than they ever were in reality. I debated about whether I would even post about this on my blog. But since it's the first web link that comes up under a google search of my name now, I might as well. LOL.

Here are a few disclaimers though. First, I never viewed any of my dating experiences as being "horrible" ... they just simply were what they were, and like everything else in my life, I just try to keep things moving forward. Second, I never dated or went out with the guy who fell asleep or feigned being asleep on the phone, after I worked up enough nerve to tell him about my mastectomy. He was so insignificant in the scheme of things, but I did find the story pretty humorous which is the only reason I mentioned it to Lisa at all. Lastly, I want to say that I feel pretty badly the first guy mentioned in the article found and read it by chance. He feels the article wrongly portrays him as having abandoned a relationship with me because of my surgery. We ultimately had a lengthy discussion about it, and I apologized for it sounding much more insulting than was actually the case. We did not end our romance because he wasn't able to handle what I was going through. In fact, we dated all throughout my chemo treatments and he was never put off by any of it. It's just that sometime during my recovery from surgery, it became evident to me that a romance between us was not going to work because of the emotional state of mind each of us was experiencing in our respective lives. Moreover, we never had an express conversation about breaking up, but to me, it was implicit in the fact that virtually no efforts were made to see eachother. So while it is true that I have not actually seen him since the day after my surgery, we have spoken many times by phone and remain friendly. As he puts it, A had nothing to do with B. And he's right. So I'm sorry if the article seems to imply that he was a coward about my cancer journey. The truth, according to him, is something more akin to the fact that he was concerned if we continued to spend time together, it may have generated mixed signals or may have been misleading given our history. I do understand his point of view, but we are different people and obviously handle our struggles very differently. Like I told him, perception is reality. I think we may still have a minor difference of opinion in terms of how to be a good friend when a romance can't continue to flourish. But to be clear, I do not think him a bad person or condemn him in any way.